In Memory of My Son on his Sixth Anniversary

In Memory of My Son on his Sixth Anniversary. – ‘Ode to Death’

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4 replies »

  1. You are very brave to return to that dark time and describe it so clearly. I know for me the key to healing, not just burying the pain, was to have had guides, friends who said, “this is what happens and this is what you do.” You have just become one of those friends for many people. Thank you.


    • Another thank you for your kind words. I am far from brave but do feel strong enough to talk and write about that time. Everyone’s experience is different and we all have our own ways of coping. I have been plagued by health issues for the last few years. Fit and healthy before that. I believe the trauma of my son’s death has manifested in the physical. I have repressed all the terrible emotions and sadness for they were too painful to mentally recall. Part of healing is release and I believe that writing gives voice to repressions in the subconscious, so too does art. After writing on Tuesday, I became very anxious and tense. My heart was racing and my sleep has been extremely poor since. What I recalled and wrote has rattled me, but that is not such a bad thing. It is a sign that my system is releasing something and for a while I will feel awful. A healing crisis of sorts. It would be worse if I felt nothing or too calm. Painful memories should trigger some sort of physical reaction for a period of time before the system settles once more. It is only if it persists that one should be concerned.

      I often find after writing intensely about a difficult or stressful card that I feel low in myself and slightly down. Again, this is a release of feelings and emotions that causes the de-stabilising effect. Certainly my experiences have given me a deeper insight into some of the more difficult cards in the tarot. I can honestly say I have been there and experienced it, and therefore it give more force and depth to the interpretations of such cards.




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