Looking For Love Spread – Interpretation

Looking For Love Spread – Interpretation

5 of Swords Reversed

Base Card  – 5 of Swords Rx

2 Wands Rx                                                                 2 of Cups Upright

Card 2 – 2 of Wands Rx                             Card 6 – 2 of Cups

                            4 of Swords Upright                        Ace of Cups

           Card 3 – 4 of Swords       Card 4 –  Ace of Cups

  3 of Pentacles Upright                                                              3 of Cups Upright

Card 1 – 3 of Pentacles                             Card 5 –  3 of Cups

Base Card – Gives background information.

Card 1 – What are the underlying causes that have prevented or blocked you from meeting your perfect partner?

Card 2 – What can you do to make the necessary changes or overcome the issues in revealed in card 1?

Card 3 – What is the best step to take right now in order to find your perfect partner?

Card 4 – Who would be the most suitable partner for me?

Card 5 –  Where am I most likely to meet my perfect partner?

Card 6 – When am I most likely to meet my perfect partner?


Reader – Your Base Card shows me that you have been through a very difficult time of late.  A lot of stresses in the past but you are coming out of it. I do think that it will be a slow progress as I feel you have been cut to the very core and hurt badly. I feel you may possibly be mourning some form of loss and even recovering from injury of some sort. Injury could be on any level; physical, emotional or psychological. This may be you or someone close to you, but I do sense that others have been involved. I feel a lot of aggression and conflict here but I may be wrong as this Card holds other meanings. However, I am zooming in on this area. If you do not relate to this or find it hard to understand, I could pull an extra couple of Cards to gain further insight.

Querant –  No, it’s okay, I think I know what it refers to and yes, things haven’t been great. I lost my sister tragically but I do not really wish to speak about it at the moment. I find it too difficult. I suppose, I’m not yet ready to deal with it.

Reader – Okay, I understand completely and I am very sorry to hear that news. However, because this Card is turning up it does bring its energy and influence into the issues or area we are seeking guidance on even if you think it is a separate issue.  You seek a deep meaningful Relationship so the very presence of this Card implies that it affecting or influencing your ability to draw love to yourself.  For the moment let us move on.  Card 1 is showing me here the reasons behind your lack of success or ability to find your perfect partner at. The Three of Pentacles coming in here would suggest that at present and for some time you have been very diligent and engrossed in building a career for yourself or perhaps study. I feel you may have been and still are putting all your efforts into a long-term goal, keeping your head down and working very hard. I don’t believe that you really have much free time to devote to socialising or romance even though you are here asking in this area. I get a sense that your priorities lie with your work or study at present even though on the surface you do desire romance. I feel you may also be keeping yourself as busy as you can with work or study to distract you from your grief. Does this make any sense to you?

Querant – Well, if I am honest I suppose that is true. I am working very hard at setting up my own business at the moment. I am also studying for exams in four subjects. I certainly do have a long-term goal and am exhaustively working towards it. I do realise that I am not really putting myself out there, because I am putting my head in books instead. Since I lost my sister I haven’t let up. In fact I think I am working so hard that I don’t give myself time to think. I was kind of hoping that love would come knocking at my door.

Reader – Well, that Card does make sense then. Let us look at Card 2 and see how you can deal with this. The Two of wands Reversed indicates in this situation that you long for intimacy, long for a change, long for something to take you out of the dreariness of your life and also your feelings. You desire change on a deep level but at present are too apathetic and lethargic in yourself to make the necessary changes.  I sense a deep loneliness and feelings of isolation.  Your study and work helps distract you by keeping you operating on automatic and gives you a perfect excuse for not making any changes at present.

You may be expecting too much too soon under the circumstances. Your world indeed has appeared to close in on you and there is a sense of entrapment here. You may feel a slave to all you have created including your ambitions and study. You desire change and freedom yet fear of the unknown and fear of change paralyses you to the extent that you are finding it impossible to make any decision for the best at present so you just keep doing what you are doing.

There is a sense that you feel like running away, just upping and going but fear holds you back. You may feel that a change of scenery or location will drive all the pain away, a fresh start in a way. Where you possibly thinking of moving far away before you lost your sister? Seeking a new life? I think your loss has somehow sapped you of your normal sense of adventure and excitement.  I think at present that you are not strong enough in yourself to make any rash decisions or any monumental changes in your life. Now is not the time to go. You must face up to your life and come to terms with your losses otherwise you may make a decision that you will regret in time to come. Your grief will follow you wherever you go, so it is best to deal with it on familiar territory first before setting off on any voyages.  Your work and study are probably holding you together and giving you a reason to get out of bed every day but they cannot be used as crutches indefinitely.

Querant – Well, you have it in a nutshell there.  I had been planning to take a year out to travel around the world with a few friends. I knew my sister was having problems but didn’t realise how serious they were.  I had saved like crazy for the last five years and the plan was to travel and work our way around the world before returning home to gain the necessary qualifications in order to set up my business. Two weeks before I was due to go, my sister died and of course under the circumstances my world fell apart and so did my plans for travel. My friends went on without me. Indeed my world has closed in on me as all I see are the four walls of my house, my books and laptop. My friends keep in touch on Facebook and Skype.  They are expecting me to join them when I finish my exams, but I can’t. I just can’t. I can’t imagine leaving my home right now. This is where my memories are and this is where I feel safe. I used to be such an impulsive and spontaneous person. I was always up for an adventure, but I have changed and I am filled with fear and dread of anything new or different. That is why; I suppose I just keep on working so hard. However, part of me feels that I just want to run away and forget everything, but deep down I know that it won’t solve anything. I know I would ruin it for my friends if I was to join them right now as they would be worried about me constantly.  The cards are right, I need to overcome all my insecurities and deal with my grief before I can rejoin normal life again.


Reader – You are a very wise and brave girl. I know you are looking for love but first you have to deal with and overcome your grief otherwise you will bring it into a new relationship and a new relationship may not be strong enough to deal with this. At present you are not yourself from what you tell me and there is a chance that you may go for a partner for all the wrong reasons only to find down the road that he is not the right person for you.

Querant – Yes, I think I knew that before I came here. I suppose I am trying to put a Band-Aid on my heart at present. I would probably be a mess in a relationship if my head is anything to go by.

Reader – Let us move on and look at what positive steps you could take to overcome or deal with the issues exposed in Card 2. In Card 3 we have the Four of Swords and it is telling me that you really need to take things easy. You are working very hard but you are not giving the essential time to deal with all the stress in your life. A word of caution comes with this card. If you don’t take time out now to gather your thoughts and physically rest you run the risk of having a breakdown of some sort, be it physical or nervous. Now is not the time to try to get out there and hit the dating game. You are mentally and emotionally exhausted and overwhelmed with life at present and all that has happened.  Trying to do this will only bring further problems upon you as new relationships can be initially quite stressful and demanding. In fact I would suggest you withdraw from any activities that are too demanding on you in order to stabilise and recuperate.

Some time spent pursuing activities such as meditation, relaxation classes, counselling and even bereavement counselling will be of enormous benefit to you and will give you the serenity and release you need at present.  It will also give you the strength to return to the normal world when the time is right. By all means continue with your studies and business plans but now is not the right time to pursue a hectic social life or seek a deep and meaningful relationship. If not, you run the risk of bringing a lot of emotional baggage into any relationship you may get involved in.

Querant – It makes sense I suppose. I am probably idealising a perfect world for myself and a perfect partner where we all live happily ever after. I just want to feel happy. Do you think I will ever feel carefree again?

Reader – Of course but you are on a journey at the moment that cannot be rushed.  Your desires are perfectly normal especially after what you have had to deal with.  You just want to wave a magic wand and conjure up utopia, a place where you don’t have to worry and have someone there for you who will be eager to wipe away your pain.

Querant – True, oh how true. I suppose I might as well dream here as in bed. In relation to counselling I saw a notice in my local newspaper advertising grief counselling. It is one-to-one for a while and then you have the option of joining on a group basis. It is funny, I normally hate all that sort of stuff but I found myself taking down the number the other day before I threw out the paper. It is still sitting at home on the kitchen table. Maybe I should try it out and see if it is of any help?  I suppose it once at least. I feel very isolated and unable to communicate my feelings with normal people at present. Ha, I am listening to myself now and here was me thinking I would be able to communicate with a new partner!

Reader – Excellent, I really think it will be worth a try. At least once as you say. I think we are really getting to the heart of the matter here and although painful, quite necessary under the circumstances. Let us now look at who Mr. Right could be.

Card 4 brings us the Ace of Cups and this is a lovely card for it heralds a new beginning, a new sense of happiness in your life but as it is a description of the right person for you, I would suggest that the perfect partner for you is someone who is very balanced and at peace with himself. This person is a joy to be around, considerate of your feelings, happy within himself and loves from the heart. This man will definitely be a true romantic and will adore you. He glows with an inner contentment. He gives love unconditionally and has enough to go around without depleting his own source. He will be very spiritual in himself. Gentle and quiet in nature he will instil confidence and self-esteem in you.  He may very well be quite creative or even artistic. You will know this person as soon as you see him.

Normally in a Reading we would look for a Court Card to represent a person but that does not always happen.  Perhaps it is for the best, for if you know too much, as in age or sun sign you may block the potential to meet the right man by unconsciously holding certain descriptive criteria.  It is best to let it evolve naturally.  The Ace of Cups is a very healthy Card and I feel that this man has had a wonderful loving upbringing and is surrounded by a strong supportive family who will be happy to welcome you into the fold.

This man may not be the normal type you go for but then again when you are ready to return to the world and put yourself back out there, you too will have changed. You will have a different outlook on life, have different priorities and needs. This man will meet them all and be very supportive of you. This relationship would be truly blessed. He will immediately put you at ease and extremely comfortable in his company. Romantic dinners in intimate restaurants or at home by the fireside, weekends away by the sea tucked up in a little old cottage or being whisked away to a magnificent castle would be his idea of a good time. He will restore your faith in life. He will herald the beginning of a very emotionally fulfilling time for you.

Querant – I can almost picture him. It is funny because normally I like to travel a lot and am always looking for a bit of excitement or adventure.  I usually go for guys who share that same view. However, whereas I seek commitment and stability in the midst of all the excitement, the men I have been involved with always seem to get restless and are eager to move on after a year max. This always leaves me depressed and insecure in myself. Maybe I have been barking up the wrong tree all this time.

Reader – You see you are already beginning to explore other possibilities. That is good. The Ace of Cups man will be happy to settle down and will even be eager to start a family. If that is what you want, it is a very positive sign indeed.

So let us move on to where you are most likely to meet this man of your dreams in Position 5. The 3 of Cups sees you rejoining the social scene and getting out and about. There is celebration here and a strong sense of rewards for hard work done. I feel this return to mainstream life will coincide with the completion of your studies and the successful launch of your business.  I see family and friends coming together as well and even a reunion with your friends who are overseas at present. Everyone is happy for you and toasting your return to life. I see many occasions for getting out and about and lots of invitations flooding in. There may indeed be new circles of friends entering your life and these could be people you met as a result of joining a counselling group or meditation classes. I do believe that you will first encounter this man on one of these occasions.

Querant – Well I better start getting to bed early in preparation for all the party time ahead. Mind you, the thoughts of it right now leave me exhausted. I would be a real ‘party pooper’ at present. The real life and soul of the party? I think not!

Reader – And that brings me nicely to the final card, Card 6 which deals with when you are most likely to meet this man. The Two of Cups coming in here again gives me three Cups in a row so far and is a far cry from the earlier cards. The Two of Cups brings balance, harmony and equality in a relationship. It brings a genuine offer of love and commitment. The Two demands balance and equilibrium and because it is a Cups Card then this Two suggests that when you have arrived at a state of inner balance and harmony within yourself, you will be in the right position to meet your partner eye to eye and on equal footing. Only then will you have something of worth to offer and also equally be in a position to receive all that your partner has to offer in return. When you have arrived at a stage when you know that you seek union not just to make you feel better or to lean on someone, but rather to enhance your life and to share the joy and love that is within you, then you will know that the time is right.

I believe the bond you had with your sister was very strong and her death left you feeling as though you had lost half of your soul.  The Two of Cups suggests that although no one will ever be able to take her place, you will have the chance to develop a very close and intimate relationship with someone else.

Cups also represent the summer, a time of joy and abundance. The card being a Two may represent the second day, week or month of summer so be very observant around this time and open to chance encounters.

There is a wonderful feeling about this Card. I do believe that this man is out there right now and at present making his own journey in life, yet slowly but surely, the distance between you narrows by the day.  You are both making your way towards the same destination but at this point in time are not yet aware of each other.  The Universe is conspiring to arrange that first encounter and it will feel just perfect when it happens.

Finishing Off

If you look diagonally across the Card Spread in front of you, you can see how the imbalance of the Two of Wands Reversed is stabilised in the Two of Cups. The Three of Pentacles gives you the drive and determination to overcome all the bad times but it is the time spent in The Four of Swords that acts as the gateway or bridge to inner happiness, release and Freedom.  It is the stabilising force that is necessary to access all that the Cups have to offer. It is very important to reflect on this Card if you wish to move forward in your life and be happy.  Many try to bypass this stage of recuperation, adjustment and introspection. They keep their head down and just hope for the best.  They usually manage to keep going but as soon as any of their stress triggers are pressed, they regress into their damaged self and behave accordingly.

Querant –  I understand perfectly what you are saying. To think I was frightened to come for this Reading and was going to cancel it yesterday.  I am so relieved I didn’t. Thank you so much. Hearing the truth is not always nice but I can see now that I was looking for a partner to make me feel better about myself and to take away the loneliness and deep loss I feel.  I know now what I have to do and for the moment I will not focus too much in the area of relationships except that of the one I have with myself.  I will continue with my plans and study as that keeps me grounded and gives me a reason for getting up each day. I will also have to come to terms with the fact that I may need some outside help to deal with my feelings at the moment. The idea of meditation or yoga appeals to me so I will look into that.  I haven’t been minding what I eat for the last while so I think a change in diet might be on the cards too. Some healthy and nutritional eating for a change I am sure would help. I suppose there is no point asking how long this is going to take as I am the only one who can answer that question. Thank you very much for helping me focus and see a light at the end of the tunnel.

I now have something lovely to think about when I go to bed at night and I am suddenly looking forward to the future and all that it may bring.      


11 replies »

  1. I agree 100%! I have been taking this course since March and I deeply appreciate it every day! Thank you so much for your care and dedication and time. You give so many different perspectives and it shows how much you’ve put into this. You have built my confidence so much in this journey. It’s a lot to retain but I have time on my side. I’m eternally grateful that I found you. My life has been changed. Never Stop!


    • Oh, what can I say in response to such a wonderful comment. The thing I will say is that thousands visit my site every day and I just get the stats. I wonder what they are doing and looking at when they visit. I just keep putting out the content and haven’t a clue if anyone even likes it. When some of these site visitors take the time to drop me a message it gives me a great boost to know that I do not toil in vain. It also personalises the stats, gives a name to a few of the numbers who pass through. So, thank you for taking the time to reach out to me in such a positive way. It made my day. Blessings. xxx


  2. Hi Vivien,
    I like your website very much, specially your way of making the pictures even more visible by means of going deep into the very personal story of each card character. Very sensitiv and gentle. I’m a tarot beginner and it helps me a lot in my approach of understanding the cards.
    I have tried to do the -looking for love spread- and I have some problems, specially with understanding card number 4 (the perfect partner) symbolised here by the reversed universe (a bit scary).
    I would be thankful if you could give me some advise with this spread. I hope it is ok if I post it here?
    Thanks a lot for your time and dedication to tarot.
    All the best

    (I need to mention, that I did a spread before with truly horrible cards and noticed afterwards that I accidentally left one card in the box (7 Cups), so I did the spread again (and then by coincidence 7 Cups was the new basis))

    The spread:
    7 Cups :
    – You reached a crossroads or turning point in life. 
    – You want to get it right this time.
    – Your challenge is to ‘know thyself’.
    – understand who you are
    – What is it that you truly want in a relationship? What is it that will make you happy?

    1. 9 Pentacles
    What are the underlying causes that have prevented or blocked you from meeting your perfect partner?
    – Menopause (true)
    – you are approaching middle-age (true)
    – You might be spending too much time on your own (true)

    2. 9 Cups
    What can you do to make the necessary changes or overcome the issues in revealed in?
    – learn to love yourself
    – putting a high value on yourself changes the type of relationships you seek
    – Check unrealistic expectations about romance or the ideal partner. 

    3. 10 pentacles Rev.
    What is the best step to take right now in order to find your perfect partner?
    – become self-reliant (not very concrete for a next step)
    – spend less time on your own (not very concrete for a next step)
    – do things in a different way than usual (not very concrete for a next step)

    (I don’t understand the difference between the results of 9 Cups and 10 pentacles, they somehow seem to tell the same?)

    4. Universe Rev.
    Who would be the most suitable partner for me
    – can represent an expat returning to their country of origin?
    – different than everybody you knew before?
    (I have had good and bad relationships. This year I fell in love with someone who left me with a broken heart)

    5. Page Cups
    Where am I most likely to meet my perfect partner?
    – special Event
    – invitation, texts or emails with incoming news.
    – social work or child care. (I’m a social worker with children)

    6. 4 Wands Rev.
    When am I most likely to meet my perfect partner?
    – the picture looks like an advent wreath, might have something to do with Christmas?
    – After saying goodbye to one life before moving happily into another? (not very concrete)

    Thank you!!!


    • Hi,

      Well done with your interpretations. They are very strong and it seems like you have identified with the bulk of cards you drew. As for menopause, here is your mate! I am in the thick of it too and having a pretty nasty time. You are right, it could be acting as a block due to the effect it has on your mood, energy levels and self-image. Sometimes it is just too exhausting to make an effort. Even if in a strong relationship menopause can take its toll, that is of course unless you are one of the lucky ones who just breeze through it minus all the rotten symptoms.

      So with regards to the Reversed Universe as who would be your perfect partner, the answer to this may be in the actual question itself. When we see the Upright Universes we could be looking at success in finding ‘The Perfect Partner’, ultimate success, someone worldly, well rounded, well balanced, grounded, successful and happy with their lot. With the Nine and Ten of Pentacles also in your reading, this might suggest you have impeccable high standards. This might lead to setting the bar so high in the search for the perfect partner that one fails to meet anyone who could possible live up to this ideal. Therefore the Reversed Universe could be telling you not to drop your standards, but to be open to those who don’t necessarily tick all the boxes. None of us are perfect. However, the Reversed Universe could also be suggesting that deep down you don’t hold out much hope for meeting the perfect partner, don’t believe there is someone out there for you. The Universe is positive and optimistic when upright, but when reversed you may feel a bit cynical about your chances especially if you have had negative experiences in the past.

      It is also quite possible the Reversed Universe could suggest the perfect partner for you is someone totally different than usual, someone who does not normally move within your sphere, not of your world. Perhaps you would never have ever thought about them as a potential partner. Remember, the Universe Reversed is not necessarily negative. It is the card of brilliant success and achievement when upright and might not be far off this when reversed too. This card could be telling you that the perfect partner is out there for you, that you will meet them but it may not happen as quickly as you would like and in this manner you may feel the Universe has failed you.

      The Nine of Pentacles often turns up for women who have carved out a nice life for themselves, are self-reliant and self-sufficient, independent both physically and financially. They are quite mature and possibly middle aged, but not always. They can get quite set in their ways and often enjoy their own company so much, they have to force themselves out to socialise with others. They typically do not get lonely in the classic as they are quite secure and stable within. When they do put themselves out to socialise, meet others or enter relationships it can be done on the basis of wanting to and not needing to. Also, if you are very definitely identifying with the Nine of Pentacles in this manner, this might also be causing issues especially if you are meeting very traditional or conventional types who might possibly be intimidated by your independence and self-reliance. There are still plenty of individuals out there who have set ideas on how the power dynamics and hierarchy in relationships should operate.

      I agree with your analysis of the Nine of Cups and yes, be careful of what you wish for. With the Seven of Cups as the base card, you may be going through a period of confusion over what or who exactly it is you want or need going forward. The Seven of Cups also hints at having options open to you. There may be suitors already but you are unsure of who really would want to settle for and what they have to offer you in a relationship. It advises you to be careful when choosing because not everyone will be as they make out to be. You need to find the diamond in the midst and this might take time. Do not hitch up with anyone before you really get to know them as looks can be deceiving. You may be tempted by the most glamorous and exciting but it might be the less exciting one you overlook who has the hidden depths and qualities to make you happy.

      The Nine of Cups could also hint at pleasures of the flesh and in this manner this card could you asking you to let your hair down a little and have a bit of fun without looking for the full deal. It is a card for indulging in sensual pleasures. The Nine of Pentacles is also a very sensual card as we see the figure dressed in luxurious clothes, walking in her garden and connecting with nature. When I think of the house she lives in I often imagine her bathroom or boudoir and see it full of luxurious pampering products, expensive perfumes and body lotions. She feels good when she pampers herself and this she does for herself first and foremost, not for others.

      The Nine of Cups and Nine of Pentacles suggest a desire for material comfort and possible wealth. With the Ten of Pentacles Reversed appearing as what action to take this card when Upright is also a card for financial and material security and stability. The Ten of Pentacles is the ultimate card for success when it comes to meeting someone who has a lot of money or someone who comes from a monied background with status and power. When Reversed this card could be asking you not to put so much emphasis on this criteria. The Reversed Ten of Pentacles leads back to the Nine of Pentacles and this might be asking to go back and ask yourself if this is what you really want as your life seems to be fine as it is. Do you need the complications of a heavy relationship in your life right now or should you pursue casual relationships for a while not looking at them from a long term commitment point of view? Also the Reversed Ten of Pentacles could be asking you to be less conventional, conservative and traditional. Don’t look in all the traditional places for the perfect partner. Move outside the castle walls.

      With The Four of Wands Reversed I get the feeling of the aftermath of a wedding or party, maybe not the event itself but connected to it. This reversed card leads back to the three of Wands so there is a chance of it being work/travel related. The Four of Wands often conjures up living in a gated community, on a compound, separated from the outside world by gates, driveways, walls and secure boundaries. It is where we feel safe and secure, our own territory so to speak. The Wands when Upright are rooted into the ground in the four but when reversed are uprooted. The security and stability are no longer active either by choice or force. You may need to venture outside the gate of your normal environment, uproot yourself. The Upright Four of Wands is a strong card for communities and groups of people who know each other, possible friends, family, neighbours, associates, work colleagues. Everything is easy and little effort is made as you know everyone. When Reversed it often points to moving, relocating, leaving a job to go to another. Everything is turned upside down and all is strange once more. However, it leads back to the three of wands which encourages you to reach out for new experiences, travel, exciting adventures. Perhaps this card means when you move out of your comfort zone and allow new experiences or new people into your life. When you become more adventurous and not always seeking the safe and secure.

      By the way, you have two actual nines and a reversed ten that naturally leads back to Nine. This could suggest a cycle coming to an end in your life or the desire for such. Could this mean after living on your own or being content with your own company, you know seek to end or change this? There are no swords in this reading which could imply you are not overly concerned or stressed about your situation or status.

      Anyway, the above are just my musings as I find it hard to do readings when not having the person sitting next to me. Please do not take any the above as definitive for they are just interesting options and food for thought. Also, if you are struggling with interpreting certain cards pull a couple of extra ones to flush out the meaning. And try not to find literal answers in the cards as per the positions they relate to. Sometimes you need to think in abstract, read between the lines and be more expansive in finding interpretations. Often students interpret the When Position in a Spread as to be related to time, as in next week, next month etc and fail to understand that ‘when’ can mean so much more. I note you looked at When from various aspects.

      So, I hope you find the above of interest. Apologies for any typos as I have been typing fast as the words came to me and am short on time to go back over it.





      • Hi Vivien,

        I posted my answer the day after you answered me (looking for love spread), but somehow it’s not there. I don’t know if I accidentally did not post it at all, or if you didn’t accept it as a post. I remember that I haven’t seen an ‘awaiting moderation’ comment like the very first time. To make sure I want to send it to you again per mail. Please accept my apologies, if you already got the first one. But anyhow I don’t want to miss the chance to thank you again for your blessed teaching and wish you a peaceful and very happy new year.

        And here comes my posting from December 11:

        Hi Vivien, you are amazing !!! Thank you so much. Please pardon my english, its not my mother tongue. I hope I am not messing up everything on your Site with my wagonload of text.

        I am as well not exactly dancing through the menopause, It’s more like an endless train – crawling heavily over my body and soul for days, months, years. I would never have imagined that hormones have such a power. Sometimes I lose believe in the idea that menopause will ever end and I would definitely celebrate if the 9s would announce the end of the menopause era. Menopause forced me to change a lot, whether I wanted the change or not, but there is still a lot I have to change to become more satisfied.

        Yes to having been content with my own company and yes to now seeking to end or change this. I wouldn’t say that I am not concerned or stressed at all about my situation or status, but I’m definitely more concerned about getting involved with the wrong person.

        There’s so much truth in your explanations. My fear concerning the reversed universe is, that the perfect partner for me probably does not exist at all. But you might be right that this could be due to my expectations. To my high standards: YES! although my claims might be regarded as low from an other point of view. I was very much in love with a man who left me after a very brief affair and although he had no money at all and was emotionally unstable, carrying very big problems with himself, I was aware that he had the most beautiful soul I have ever seen. At this point I cannot imagine to meet anyone who could possibly surpass this truly loveable weirdo.

        I will try to leave my comfort zone (4 Wands reversed), regarding the fact that sometimes a horizon is limited because someone is fixated on something, unable to see behind or over it.

        Maybe the 4 of Wands reversed wants to teach me to listen carefully to someone I might not be interested in at first. This person could let me experience new thoughts and guide me outside my usual ways of thinking.

        Your advice to the 10 of pentacles reversed could be very true. At this point it could fit me better to go for a more unconventional relationship as I’ve always moved together with each partner very fast. Even if my partners were unconventional, our relationship-roles were mainly traditional.

        Normally I seem to attract unconventional people and I feel attracted to them as well. Someone outside my usual environment would be someone like the classic image of a lawyer, an accountant or a car dealer and – I must say – someone who is emotionally stable could be quite a new experience as well. Said to say.

        I did a second spread a few days ago asking what the reversed Universe card means in this context and here is the result: (cross) 1. It deals with: Reversed Page of Cups 2. Not this: Reversed Kind of Swords 3. That’s it: upright Justice 4. It leads to: upright 4 of Wands

        How strange it was having these 2 cards from the first spread reversed now. I guess it means that this time it is NOT going to be a psycho (reversed King of Swords), but someone who is emotionally stable (upright Justice), even though he might have had a broken childhood (reversed Page of Cups) 4 of Wands probably gives hope for a good ending?

        Obviously I’ve still a lot of hope, that my lovely weirdo suddenly becomes mentally stable and comes back to me, but I guess that’s not how life is and as long as the world keeps turning, I will I have to turn too.

        In summary, maybe I should assume that someday I will meet a perfect partner and in the meantime I should try to go for unconventional affairs, like you suggested. That’s a huge challenge for me anyway.

        Thank you very much! The way you go guide through the cards opens my world of seeing. You move through the interpretations in a very careful and benevolent way and I appreciate that a lot. If you see or feel something I have missed or overseen with my conclusions please let me know.

        Kind regards Matilda


      • Hi Matilda,

        I am just seeing this message for the first time and am not aware of receiving an earlier one. However I have been on restricted typing and computer work for the last while due to a flare up of repetitive injury strain and may not have seen it in the backlog of correspondence that is building.

        In relation to your follow up reading, ‘I did a second spread a few days ago asking what the reversed Universe card means in this context and here is the result: (cross) 1. It deals with: Reversed Page of Cups 2. Not this: Reversed Kind of Swords 3. That’s it: upright Justice 4. It leads to: upright 4 of Wands.’

        The Reversed Page of Cups could be acting as confirmation of unrealistic expectations, being too idealistic, dreamy about love. The Upright Universe would point to a relationship that is grounded in reality. When it reverses we lose the grounding connection and relationships become less tangible. The reversed Page of Cups’ potentially unrealistic approach to love and relationships may keep that Universe in Reversed mode (struggling to find success and completion in a relationship) and it may be pointing this out to you.

        I would also be wary of the connection between Reversed Page of Cups and Reversed Universe. Take away the placings of the previous reading, it may be pointing out that lack of ultimate success in finding a mature and balanced relationship could be down to being drawn to emotionally immature/needy/unavailable partners. You may feel a need to look after them, care for them, make up for any hurt they have experienced in life. A reversed Page of Cups would not be the ideal partner for someone looking for a mature and equal relationship, especially the Nine of Pentacles character. It could lead to you having to pander to the shifting whims and moods of another. This could be throwing a light on the nature of the Reversed Universe in that you miss out on the ultimate success in love because of this. A relationship with the Reversed Page of Cups could end up very one-sided with their sensitive needs taking priority over yours. Reversed Court Cards in a reading can also suggest ‘do not act like me’, ‘I am the last type of person you need’ ‘aspire to the upright of me, not the reverse’. Sometimes we also need to be told to not act like the character portrayed if that character is sabotaging our success, good-intentioned or not, and we are identifying with that character. Letting a Reversed Page of Cups influence our behaviour when for example a situation requires us to be strong and courageous won’t help us achieve our aims, so the Reversed Page of Cups would be telling us that even though this may be the default character we morph into when exposed to certain scenarios or stimuli, it would be in our best interests if we made an effort to overpower this inclination for the time being. It may have worked for us in the past, but won’t get us very far now.E.g. turning on the tears when we have screwed up may not get us any sympathy, but owning up to what we have done and taking responsibility may earn us respect, even if it is begrudgingly given. So the Page of Cups rx might be saying ‘for god’s sake, any body but the likes of me will be your ideal partner’.

        Not This – Reversed King of Swords. Assuming Not This refers to the Reversed Universe not being about this card, The Reversed Swords King may be less of a problem than the Reversed Page of Cups, but wouldn’t be ideal either. If we ignore the ‘Not This’ aspect of the Reversed King, we might be looking at a joint connection with the Reversed Universe. Similar to the Reversed Page of Cups, it could also mean, ‘not this type either’. Sometimes it takes more than one card to get the message across and tarot will often use a nearby card position to highlight this even if it bears no connection to the meaning that is allocated to that position. Sometimes you must disregard what the position is dictating if a card is desperately trying to tell you something. The Reversed King of Swords is rarely a desirable character if he is actually representing a character, so ‘Not This’ may not be enough to let him off the hook if you know what I mean. Combine a Reversed Page of Cups with a Reversed King of Swords and you may get a psychologically and emotionally dysfunctional adult due to a dysfunctional childhood. The Reversed Page of Cups grows into Reversed King of Swords.

        However, you do mention the potential of embracing a potential partner who may have had problems in early life, not an ideal childhood, but has a lovely soul despite it all. This suggests you might be prepared to put up with the issues that may arise from such a relationship and find true happiness in it. The Reversed Universe could be indicating this. In an imperfect world we will find imperfect or damaged people who also need to love and be loved. Many people are drawn to such relationships while others run as far from them as possible, unable to accept or deal with the baggage they bring. You mention ‘Obviously I’ve still a lot of hope, that my lovely weirdo suddenly becomes mentally stable and comes back to me, but I guess that’s not how life is and as long as the world keeps turning, I will I have to turn too.’Do you connect this person to the Reversed Page and Reversed King of Swords as they would be both emotionally and psychologically unstable or undisciplined? We do have justice and The Four of Wands. These two cards could suggest making a future relationship formal as in marriage. Could this be showing us that your true desire would be for this person to come back to you and that you would be ready to commit to them if they did? If so, Justice would ask you to think long and hard about it before making a decision as you would be taking on quite a lot and must be aware of the consequences. Your decision would have far reaching impact on your future.

        Again Matilda, these are just musings that come to me as I type and should not be taken as a direct interpretation of your cards.




  3. Hi Vivien,

    I’m sorry it took me so long to answer, but due to a family tragedy I had to go to my country for a couple of weeks.

    I wanted to let you know what happened next and how the ‘looking for love spread’ did foretell this.
    The man I like so much (Reversed Universe) wrote me a mail (Page of Cups) two days after new year (Reversed 4 of Wands) explaining himself.
    I can’t believe how exactly the cards did foretell this. I could definitely not know that he would come back to me and I did not count on that anymore.

    In relation to the reading that followed (cross):
    For sure he had a Reversed Page of Cups childhood, but I think he definitely has nothing to do with any of the King of Swords. I think I have met King of Swords men, both, Reversed and Upright.
    I feel the Reversed King is empty and cold-clear and sometimes, when he pretends to be soft and nice, I can still feel his bitterness and emptiness. I feel a huge lack of emotions in the Reversed King of Swords and I would see him as a narcissistic manipulator.
    In the Upright King of Swords I would see someone with a huge intelligence, but problems in nonverbal or emotional communication, a limited understanding of emotions without any kind of malignity, more like asperger syndrome.

    I don’t know if I manage to explain what I mean. I don’t see any of these things in the man I like, but I see his difficult childhood and his actual problems with depression and fears.

    I haven’t decided yet what to do, due to my family problems, but also due to the fact, that I am scared to confront reality. I seem to be a Reversed Page of Cups myself.
    The Justice Card together with the 4 of Wands also scare me, as they suggest making a relation formal. This probably has to do with the Reversed Page of Cups within myself and an actual fear of relationships I didn’t have in younger years.

    I’m grateful, you were very very helpful and I think you are really gifted.

    Thank you and all the best


    • Hi Matilda,

      Sorry to hear about your family tragedy. It is lovely that this man has reached out to you in such a manner by actually going to the trouble of sending you a letter. Take your time and do not be in a rush to commit. Let things go gently along and you will be in a better position to truly get to know this person. You will also be in a better position to determine if his depression and fears are something you are happy to take on. I wish you the very best of luck but please do not disregard your own self-care. Any potential relationships must enhance your life and not take away from it. Justice reminds you of consequences for any actions taken. The Four of Wands depicts the good bits, the highs only. What it doesn’t show are the lows etc. Both must be faced and embraced. It is normal to feel fearful about letting someone into your life.



  4. Hi Vivien,

    Thank you very much for your sympathetic words. I think you are right with your advice of slowing down/not to rush things and keeping in mind really taking care of myself. I want to do it right this time and I will try to give it the time it needs.

    I cannot thank you enough for your work. The way you write stories about each card is helping me to get to know the cards with more than one sense. Hearing the noises you describe in the 8 of Wands is helping me to let go brainwork from time to time and just concentrate on the sound of each card. Its magic! You are truly gifted!

    Kind regards


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